Lili's Lost It
by InSaNeAngelsgottanAK47
Summary: France attempted to 'invade Lili's vital regions'. Swissy declared war on France, and goes of to fight his army whil France himself gets invited to Lili's praty by Lili herself. Her party guests include Belarus, Poland, and Hungary Little Lili has a gun. Oh poor Sitzy, when he comes home to a cussing Lili and a blood-drenched house...


**okay, so, I know that I should be updating all my other three multi-chapter fics, but this just invaded my mind and was like, "You will write me. Write about Bloody Lili. You WILL WRITE MEEEE!" And so, I just had to! It was so cute, I couldn't help! Yeah... I have one messed up sence of that word sometimes... **

**anywaaays~ random voice who says random things such singing "your girls gotta li'l ol' booty, my girls gotta big ol booty" over the speaker when my brother brings his girlfriend over, which I so didn't create to annoy my cousin and wind up annoyed myself, Do da disclaimer, paleez~**

**COMPUTER-VOICE INSTALLED IN WALL: I gotta say, you are not nearly as geniis enough to own something as geniosly awesome as Italy: Aksis Poopers.**

**-_-' 1) I'm pretty sure that you spelled genius wrong, and 2) It's Hetalia: Axis Powers... Dumb computer...**

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Lili looked up at her big brother. France had attempted to invade her vital regions, and he blew the fuse.; He had finally declared war on France. France had convinced (bribed with a vow to stay fully dressed before, during, and after a world meeting) England, America, and Germany to help him. The only reason Germany was doing it was because he did not want 'his Italy to see another mans body' (Lili's, Hungary's, Polands, and Japans wordings). Switzerland had Russia as in ally. Russia joined just to annoy the crap out of America. "It will be fun, da?" was his wordings... Anyways, the Swiss nation stood in front of his 'innocent baby' sister. Notice the qoutations around 'innocent baby'

"Big Buder, I'm scared!"

" Don't wrry Lili, I'll come back. Here is a gun to protect yourself while I'm gone, and the keys to my gun shed... I might be gone for a long time."

"That's not what's scaring me... I think you left the bathtub on and I don't want to waste money..."

"...Oh...turn it off, then" Switzerland seemed to sweat-drop epicly.

"Okay!" she was so (not)oblivious to what was going on

As soon as Vash was out of hearing-range, she picked up her phone. It was time to make some important phone-calls.

"Hello, Natty? yes this is Lili, nono, I'm fi- Don't worry, he's strong... Yes, yes, well- Oh, I see... Well, I was going to call the girls-yes, Pola-... I get it, Natty, but it'll be fun!... Please?... yes, he'll probably be gone for a few days...Yes, six... And bring your _specialty..._Yes, of course. Why wouldn't I? I'll see you there, Natalia... Yes, of course, my friend~ And could you call katty?... Thanks" It seems our not-so-innocent little girl was cooking something. She dialed another number on her phone and let it ring for a minute. Luckily, Lili wasn't kept waiting for long.

"Hello, my little pupil... Yes, this is Lili. No, I don't have another one for you yet... Vash has gone on some battle or ano-... No,no, no, that's not it, I was wondering.-...You know me so well~ Six sharp...Yes, that would be helpful, I'm worried that she won't pick up for me... Of course... It's [939-8729]... Yes, just put that infrtont of it. Thank you, my little pupil...Don't worry, He'll be gone for a while... Yes, I already took care of them... Of course I'm calling him!...So wha-...Yes, I know, but it'll be fine. Yes, six o'clock sharp. Got it? Good, see you then." This time Lili hung up before the other. She was so proud of her little apprentice~. Lili dialed yet another number. This one was picked up almost immediatly. Lili winced as the voice shoued through the phone

"LILI! I AM, SO LIKE, TOTES SORRY! I HEARD VASH HAD, LIEK, DECLAIRED WAR ON, LIKE FRANCE FOR, LIKE BEING SO, LIKE TOTTALLY ANNOYING! ARE YOU, LIKE, OKAY?"

Yep, Poland neveer changes. "Yes, my friend. In fact, Vash just left for a battle right now~... Oh, I just thought it would be a good time for a girls get together~...yes, I, Like so, like totes underastand that you are, like, compeletly male, but I like, think of You as, Like, one hell of an amazing 'girlfriend'~"She laughed at thier inside joke. And Yes, Lili had just cussed. "And I know that under normal secumstances, this would be uncalled for, buuut~...Yep!... No,n poease don't... Yes, that would be helpful...Could you not bring that up?..No, Hu-...yes, yes, of course... I'll take care of it... I know, I got the keys to Big Bruders shed~... Yes, of course...Six o'clock sharp, please~"

Now, she just had one more phone call to make. After dialin g the number, It rang a few times before going to voicemail. She sighed. oh wells~

"Umm, France, I forgive you for being mean to me, and, umm, I was wondering if you would like to, umm, come over and help me and the gals-plus Poland, of course- have some..._fun. Please, the party wouldn't be complete without you! _big Bruder will be gone for a few days. Came by at seven o'clock sharp~"

Now to wait.

She fell asleep on the pure white couch- the only one in the halls.

Her three friends arrived at her house, and then France.

Oh,

the

_fun_

that

these

girls

had

**A few days later, a very annoyed Swiss Nation came home. Not once had France shown his ugly gob. I wonder why?*sarcasm***

"WOOHOO!" bang bang "HAHA, TAKE THAT, FRANCY-PANTS! I CAN TORURE YOU TO MY HEARTS CONTENT!"

"EEP! RUN AWAY!

"DAMN PERVERT, GET BACK HERE SO I CAN RIP YOU BALLS OFF AND FEED THEM TO YOU! IF YOU HAVE ANY, THAT IS."

Switzerland paused momentarily. Why did the cussing voice sound so simalur to his pure, innocent, baby sister? He barged into the house, and was startled to see Lili laughing her head off with his one of his many AK-47'S PPointed at the toads head.

"DAMN, PERVERTED BASTARD! FUCK OFF! I DON'T GIVE A DAMN WH-y h-hell-hello there...Big Bruder?" She quickly tried to hid what she was doing and attempted an accuse with teary eyes. "I-I had called some friends over to keep me company while you were away, since I had begun to have nightmares, and sudden;y France appeared here. I-I had to use self defense!"

"Why were you cussing, then?" She immediatly stopped the act and took on an annoyed expression.

"Damn... You caught me, your seemingly Oh-so-innocent-and-cute-and-bright-little-baby turns out to be the toughest and most respected and feared amongst us females.

"Hey, Lili, why did the screami-" Belarus was cut off when she saw Sitzerland sitting bewildered on the blood red couch-the only one in the halls. "Oh... Is big Bruder here?" He nodded just as Russia came in. The tall nations eyes widened before they took on their normal size.

"It looks like your house had just wittnessed mopre battles than our battlefield."

"Da, big brother, it probably had. France here was not very willing to be broken. We got him, of course~" Russia looked from Lili to Natalia fearfully

"I LIKE, SO TOTES LIKE, JUST HEARD, LIKE, RUSSIA'S VOICE! ARE YOUR BIG BROTHERS, LIKE, FINALLY BACK?'

"LIKE, SHUT UP, POLAND!" Lili and nat yelled together, causing HUngary to come in to see a single cross-dresser cowering under the two most feared females's glares and the two confused stares of the big brothers of said females. "Oh, boy. Lady Lili, would you like me to clean this mess up?" the brothers chocked on teir air as she said 'lady'

"Yes, Lady Lili. It was partially my fault for making those explosives." This left both brothers fainted on the floor at Natalia's comment.

"I thought that i told you to lay off the 'lady's" Lili sighed. After a quick apolagy, she made shooing motions with her hands. "Take them to the one clean bed please. And-Oh dear god, _**CRACK** **PAIRING!**_Hungary, go make a good story about this crack pairing. And this time, don't rely on instinct to put random lines where they don't belong~"

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**Written on whim and crack at 11:03. Well, i've pulled later~ I hope that you enjotyed it~(: Oh, and could you please press that pretty little blue button on the bottom of the screen? Thankies bunches!**

**~The Insane monster one under you bed...O.e...Naaw, just kiddin**

**P.S, I really do have that random voice machine thingy on my computer!**


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